So last weekend there was finally one good news in terms of the tedious graduate school application process. But the Chinese or superstitious part of me is afraid to share this good news with too many people so that I would not jinx it. I always have this strong need to keep the balance of the good and the bad to feel that I'm living in a realistic life. Maybe that's very Buddhist of me, or it could just be pure anxiety. Now I'm writing on this blog which technically people all over the world can read but still not saying what IT really is. You can probably tell how repressed I am about expressing happiness.
I got this amulet thing specifically for school when I was in the Old Streets in Tainan last month. An old man who smelled like temple incense handmade it which made it seem very legitimate. I don't even understand the difference between all those tiny stones in the bag. But somehow having them in my bag makes me feel safe and protected. If it's the Higher Power's will to make me be as queer as I can even in academia for at least the next 5 years of my life, then I guess I should not resist.
Just let me go to NYC already, please!
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